Should You Elope?

It’s a lot of money to spend on a single day, so it's understandable that couples are choosing to get married further away than the local registry office. 

Some couples will choose a destination wedding.  Others will choose to elope

But it isn't always about the money.  Some couples don't want the fuss of a wedding. Others might find it too stressful to cut the guest list down. For many, eloping is seen as romantic and exciting. 

The UK wedding industry is worth an eye-watering 10 billion pounds annually, and isn't there just something wonderfully rebellious about deciding to run away and do something secret, something small? 

But modern elopements don't have to mean that close family and friends can't be there, too.  Why not have the best of both worlds: an intimate ceremony surrounded by immediate family and closest friends. 

Elopements might be popular with couples but they won't be popular with everyone. This is especially true if you're planning on sneaking off just you and your partner.  People will be upset. Feelings will be hurt. You can probably handle Great-Aunt Ethel's disappointment but what about your parents? your siblings? your grandparents and best friend? 

It can be a difficult rift to heal. 

Ultimately, you have to do what's right for you and your partner but you should at least consider the impact a traditional elopement will have on those closest to you.

Don't feel constrained by labels.  If you want to elope with your parents or siblings or best friend there, then that's absolutely fine.  
Embrace the romance, the intimacy of eloping without the just-the-two-of-us vibe. 

Or go full Lydia Bennet, and to hell with what anyone else says. 

What happens when you get back?

Once you've got married then it's time to start telling people. 

Tempting as it might be, this isn't the time for a Facebook status or a group email. Or at least not for your inner circle of friends and family, and they're the ones who should be told first. 

Parents, siblings and immediate family should be told face-to-face (assuming, of course, that you're close to them).  Beyond that, it's up to you.  You could write a letter or make phone calls.
Don't mistake initial shock for disapproval.  If they love you, then they'll get over it. 

Once those closest to you have been told then it's fine to announce your news on social media. 

If you had a photographer on the big day, then showing the wedding pictures is a good way of giving people a connection to the day. 

Perhaps, too, you could organise a post-wedding event. It doesn't need to be a wedding reception. It could be a quiet weekend away with the parents or a meal out one evening or a house party one weekend.  It could be as big or as low-key as you like but including everyone in some small way will go a long way to smoothing any ruffled feathers. 

Communication is always key in situations like this.  Talking and explaining why you chose to elope will help.  You might not think you owe anybody an explanation but it's a useful thing to do nonetheless. 

Did you elope? We'd love to hear your stories! Share them on our Twitter and Facebook pages. 

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